Ning Yan replied without a moment’s thought. “No.”
A flicker of disappointment stirred in Bai Qingqing’s heart. She puffed out her cheeks in quiet defiance. “Oh.”
Well, of course. She had been even more delicate and prone to tears as a child than she was now. He must have found her annoying—why would he remember someone like that?
She had originally thought of revealing her identity to him, but now she quickly dismissed the idea. What if she said everything and he still didn’t remember? That would be unbearably awkward, like she was trying to force a connection out of thin air.
“And why are you still calling me ‘Lord Ning’? Weren’t you the one saying how grateful you were? Just words with no sincerity?”
Ning Yan sounded displeased. Why should he be addressed the same way as Ning Zhao?
Bai Qingqing snapped out of her thoughts and stammered, “I… I did think about it…”
“Oh? Then let’s hear it.”
Her lips parted, but no sound came out. Her eyes began to wander evasively, and a faint, nearly imperceptible blush bloomed across her porcelain cheeks as her thoughts tangled.
Should she really follow Brother Pei’s advice?
“…Brother.”
She mumbled the word, her voice barely louder than a mosquito’s hum—so soft it vanished in the air. Ning Yan didn’t even catch it and instinctively frowned. “...What?”
Bai Qingqing turned her head away. “Forget it. Pretend I didn’t say anything. I’ll think of something else…”
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Ning Yan’s eyes drifted to the tip of her ear. Just from that one word, her dainty little ear had flushed almost crimson. He was intrigued.
“No, I didn’t hear it. Say it again.”
“…No.”
Bai Qingqing immediately regretted it—how could she have blurted it out without thinking? “I haven’t decided yet. Let me think it over.”
She bowed her head in embarrassment, fiddling with the silk fan in her hands. Without warning, her wrist was seized. She looked up to find Ning Yan’s face set in an imperious expression.
“I told you to say it again.”
Her brows furrowed at once. “Why are you being so fierce? I said no!”
Ning Yan: “…”
Fierce? How the hell was that fierce?
He took a deep breath. The more she refused, the more it gnawed at his curiosity. Anyone else, he’d have threatened already. But with Bai Qingqing, the moment he so much as raised his voice, she called it bullying—and she was the type who responded only to gentleness, not pressure.
He let go of her wrist, and just as he curved his lips into a faint smile, she looked at him with blatant suspicion.
“…You don’t have to force yourself to smile if you don’t want to. It’s kind of scary.”
Ning Yan: “…”
“I wasn’t being fierce. I just didn’t hear it clearly and wanted to hear it again. You know, out there, everyone treats me with such formality. It’s rare to be called anything different. Being in a high position comes with its own frustrations…”
As he spoke, he kept watching her from the corner of his eye. Seeing the wariness slowly fade from her face, he pushed a little further, letting out a barely audible sigh. “Do you know why I asked you to repay me this way? It’s because I’ve never heard it before.”
If Bai Qingqing had thought a little harder, she’d have seen right through the nonsense. Who in their right mind needed to hear a different form of address? And what kind of high-ranking official had that sort of grievance? It was utter rubbish.
But at that moment, Ning Yan’s expression was disarmingly convincing. The corners of his phoenix eyes drooped, his usual slyness nowhere to be seen. His flawless face held a quiet melancholy, just enough to stir a thread of sympathy from the heart.
Soft-hearted as she was, Bai Qingqing couldn’t help but want to comfort him. “Actually… no matter how people address you, it’s always out of respect.”
“It’s just—after hearing too much respect, I wanted to hear something different for once.”