Chapter 437: The roles would be reversed in reality
Andrew followed up with Leonardo and his best friend a few weeks later. After he had been by to supervise the renovations of his own house, how the renovations of the second company building were going, and after he’d finished his classes for the day.
Andrew had told Maxwell what had happened, and Maxwell had grown invested. As had everyone else that he had spoken to.
It was a very cute thing that everyone was interested in what the two little baby alpha and omega were doing. Leonardo, like Jenny had worried, had a hard heat. Just like she had before she met Kim. He was down and out until they found a formula that worked for him. It took them two weeks to figure it out, and the whole time, he called his ’best friend’ just to hear her voice.
His ’best friend’ had answered the phone. Never let it go to voicemail. Even when she was in class, and no one punished her for it. Especially since Jenny had come into the school the day after picking up Leonardo and laid down the law. If this was what was going on, everyone was going to be supportive of it.
If a child complained? Tough luck. If a parent complained? Send them her contact info. She was not about to let something beautiful get tainted by some bitchy kids and adults. Andrew loved her for it.
Leonardo was doing better now that he had a medication that worked for him. He was feeling more like himself, but like Richard, he had to learn how to control himself and this change that happened in his body. He was taking it a lot better than Andrew thought.
Then again, this was a normal procedure for teens, a little less normal for people who were Andrew’s age. Andrew was able to bond with him over what he had to do when he manifested, and he was able to give Jenny and Kim some time, a break, from observing and keeping their son company.
He had his own schoolwork to do, and Maxwell didn’t need him at the company, nor did anyone else. He also wasn’t really affected by the pheromones of a teen, so Andrew was a safe bet. It was funny that Leonardo told Andrew that he stunk like another omega. He couldn’t pinpoint who it was from the scent, but he knew it was Maxwell.
He told Andrew that he stunk, but there was humour in his gaze when he did so. It was clear he was just teasing the older man, and Andrew took it.
Honestly, Andrew hadn’t hung out with younger people, younger adults in a long time. It was...healing in many ways. To see who Leonardo was turning into, to see what the youth were like and how different the world they lived in was from the one that Andrew had lived in...It was therapeutic.
Andrew even told his therapist about it a few days later when he had his therapy session, and they were very interested in what Andrew had to say about it. They quizzed Andrew about it, asking him how he felt, why he felt that way, and delving into the deeper issues through Andrew’s feelings.
It was a hard hitting session, since it poked at the disparities Andrew had growing up compared to what he was seeing right now. He felt like jelly, soft and delicate when he came back. Maxwell was home since it had gone past when the work day would end for him, and he was being a sweet man by warming up dinner for the four of them.
Ellis was coming home with Maxwell quite a bit now that Richard and Ellis were dating, and Maxwell hadn’t changed his behaviour at all. It was probably for the best, honestly. Ellis seemed to like it that way. Having Maxwell still call him Mr. Newman, treat him like he always had.
Andrew had a feeling that their relationship would always be that way, and that was just how their friendship was going to be. He was just happy that it seemed to work for them.
Either way, Maxwell was warm, ready and waiting when Andrew came into the house, a shell of a man from a serious session. Maxwell took one look at the big man, looking up from their semi-destroyed kitchen, and just stopped what he was doing and held out his arms.
Andrew went instantly. Letting Maxwell comfort him as he held his whole world tightly. That had been a hard session. Actually, the only sessions that hadn’t been hard were the first ones, when the therapist was trying to get to know Andrew and see if they were a fit for each other. Every session after that?
Felt like pins being shoved under his fingernails.
Andrew hated talking about himself like that. Hated telling others what was going on with him. He liked when others just saw him as the happy go lucky man, who everyone could trust. Could have faith in that he would always have their back. He didn’t like having to unpack his own issues.
Maxwell didn’t say a word, this having become a common occurrence since Andrew started his own therapy. He just held the man, patting his head and whispering sweet words to the man. Things that meant nothing, but soothed the bigger man.
Andrew clung to him, grappling with the things that he had learned today. They had poked at the big one. The reason why he had issues with having kids, especially when he liked being around kids so much. Protecting them.
They had asked outright, why Andrew thought that he would be a bad father when his track record with kids was spectacular? Why did he think he would turn out like his father, when Andrew had already put in the work, through spite, to not be a single thing like him?
Andrew hadn’t had an answer right away. In fact, he hadn’t had an answer the whole time. So the therapist hit him over the head with the facts. Not with anything else, and it had left Andrew woozy. It was a hard thing to grapple with, and when Andrew looked down at the man who was comforting him, who would be his partner if they decided to have kids, he just started crying.
Maxwell panicked, immediately.
"Hey, what’s wrong? Did I-" Andrew shook his head at Maxwell’s quick response. He just buried his head in his shoulder, holding him closer.
"No. You did nothing wrong." Andrew said, the words having a greater impact because it was the same words that the therapist had told him only half an hour earlier. Andrew let the tears pour, while Maxwell held him, his hands fluttering on his back with his own concern.
Andrew couldn’t speak about it though. The lump in his throat was too tight, pressing against his emotions. It was too hard to speak about. Andrew didn’t want to deny Maxwell the pleasure of being a parent. Knew that Maxwell would be a good one.
He also knew that Maxwell wouldn’t be the kind of person to go behind his back to get pregnant, or get pregnant with someone else’s kid. The thought, even if he knew he was thinking about it in the negative, made Andrew sick to his stomach. Honestly, Maxwell was more likely to adopt if Andrew said he couldn’t, wouldn’t have biological children, but again, that was depriving Maxwell of the pleasure of being pregnant, knowing that the kid you were carrying was your own flesh and blood.
Andrew felt raw as he had the thoughts. Because now he had to think about himself. What did that mean for him? Did he...did he want to be a parent? Andrew hadn’t really thought about that too much. He’d always liked kids, but mentally, he’d always shut off that pathway. The pathway that connected Andrew to children through biological means.
He had never asked himself if he wanted kids, he had always gone immediately to ’he would be a bad parent’. He never gave himself a chance. Admittedly, he had given in to the kid conversation to appease Maxwell, which wasn’t a hard thing to do. He could have kids with Maxwell, but there was...
The icky feeling in his stomach, in his heart was because he didn’t want to be like his father. Everyone was telling him that he wouldn’t be like him. He was sure at this point that even his Mom was going to show up in his dreams and tell him that he wasn’t going to be like him either.
Andrew sobbed softly, quietly, squeezing Maxwell tightly in his arms.
"Andy, Baby, this is killing me. Are you alright?" Maxwell asked softly, his voice breaking. Maxwell didn’t handle these kinds of tears well when they came from Andrew. Andrew swallowed the lump in his throat. Attempting to push it down so that he could speak.
"I spent the day with Leo." Andrew started and Maxwell nodded.
"Yeah. I know. You sent me a picture of the two of you together. It was cute." Maxwell confirmed and Andrew gulped more oxygen into his lungs.
"I spoke to my therapist about it." Andrew said quietly, before his shoulders shook. "I’m so scared, Maxy. What if I fuck them up?" Andrew whispered. "What if they come out like me? What if they hate me?" It took Maxwell a few seconds to connect the dots, to see where Andrew was going with his words, but when he did, he softened.
"Oh Baby. How could they ever hate you? How could you fuck them up? So what if they walk in on us one day? That’s a normal experience. If anything, I’m worried they are going to hate me. I’m going to be so hard and mean. What if I’m the one they cut contact with?" Andrew hiccupped at Maxwell’s question.
"They could never. You’re so kind." Andrew told him and Maxwell gave a soft chuckle.
"Andrew, I don’t love kids like you do. I want kids, but I want kids because of you, because you’ll be the father. I wouldn’t want kids if I had never found you." Andrew felt the words like a punch in the gut. He had heard him when Maxwell had said them before, but it really hit him this time.
"No. You’d make a great parent." Andrew told him and Maxwell chuckled.
"Only because you would be my other half. I know myself, Andy, and you normally do know yourself as well. It surprises me that this is the spot where you are so blind to your own nature. You’re your Mother’s son, Baby. You’ve told me how kind and sweet she was, and you are exactly like her. You just spent the day with Leonardo, and you enjoyed it." Maxwell pointed out and Andrew sobbed. He nodded.
"I-I did." Andrew agreed. Maxwell squeezed him tightly.
"Baby, you fought for kids to have a daycare at my company, because you didn’t want them to have a terrible time at other daycares. People hand off babies to you for you to hold and protect. People trust you so intrinsically with their children. I’m sorry that you think that you won’t be a good father, but I just can’t see it. Did your therapist say the same thing?" Maxwell asked and Andrew sniffed.
"K-Kind of." Andrew agreed and Maxwell sighed.
"Well, take your time figuring this out, alright? I’m here the whole way, but, I should get dinner finished before Richard and Mr. Newman come down for dinner." Andrew nodded, feeling vulnerable and itchy in his skin still. Maxwell gave him one last squeeze, before taking him around the not torn up island yet and sitting him down on a stool there.
It was only a few minutes later that Richard and Ellis came downstairs, and Richard clocked that Andrew had puffy eyes, but Ellis was a professional and said nothing about it. Instead, he helped set the table while Richard kept glancing at Andrew, before finally reaching over and ruffling his hair.
"Whatever’s bothering you, get over it. You look terrible. Can’t have Maxy pulling out of the wedding because you look too ugly." Richard told him, and Ellis smacked his shoulder. Richard laughed, and Andrew cracked a smile.